Friday, December 31, 2010

AS I SAY GOODBYE...

AS I SAY GOODBYE TO ANOTHER YEAR, I LOOK BACK ON ALL THE EXPERIENCES THAT I CAN NOW ADD ON TO “THE PAST”. TWENTY-TEN HAS BEEN ONE OF THOSE YEARS WHEN I CAN HONESTLY SAY THAT I’VE HAD MORE GOOD TIMES THAN BAD. AT THIS TIME LAST YEAR I WAS IN TEARS AND WISHING AND HOPING THE YEAR TO AN END…TOTAL OPPOSITE NOW. THIS YEAR HAS BEEN FILLED WITH SO MANY LESSONS, SO MUCH LAUGHTER, SO MANY MEMORIES, AND SO MUCH TO LOOK FORWARD TO. I MET MORE INSPIRATIONAL, SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE THAN EVER BEFORE. I FINALLY FOUND THAT BALANCE BETWEEN BEING A MOTHER AND BEING A WOMAN. I GAVE UP TRYING TO RELIVE MY EARLY TWENTIES AND JUST LET MYSELF FALL GRACEFULLY INTO MY THIRTIES WITHOUT FEELING LIKE IT WAS A MAJOR CRISIS. I BECAME A BETTER FRIEND, A BETTER MOTHER, A BETTER DAUGHTER AND A BETTER “ME”. I LET GO OF PEOPLE WHO WEREN’T ADDING ANYTHING POSITIVE TO MY LIFE AND REPLACED THEM WITH MOTIVATORS…PEOPLE WHO ENCOURAGED MY GROWTH. I ALLOWED MYSELF TO TAKE A FEW CHANCES. I JUMPED OUTSIDE OF MY COMFORT ZONE IN ORDER TO EXPERIENCE NEW THINGS THAT HELPED ME REALIZE SOME VERY IMPORTANT THINGS ABOUT LIFE. I READ BOOKS THAT CHANGED ME ON THE INSIDE IN ALL SORTS OF WAYS. I SPENT PLENTY DAYS ALONE…SOMETHING THAT TURNED OUT TO BE SO GOOD FOR MY SOUL. I PLANNED AND EXECUTED THE MOST SPECIAL BIRTHDAY THAT A TEN YEAR OLD COULD EVER IMAGINE. I BEGAN TRADITIONS THAT CREATED SUCH PERFECT MEMORIES. I REFUSED TO SPEND ONE DAY IN MY DARKENED BEDROOM SAD. ON THOSE DAYS WHEN THE EVERYDAY FATIGUE OF LIFE AND THE DAILY GRIND WERE GETTING THE BEST OF ME, I LISTENED TO MY BODY AND MY MIND AND I GAVE THEM BOTH A REST INSTEAD OF PUSHING MYSELF OVER THE EDGE. I SIMPLY STOPPED. I STOPPED TRYING TO BE EVERYWHERE AT ONCE; STOPPED TRYING TO BE EVERYBODY’S EVERYTHING…AND I JUST TOOK CARE OF ME. SO, THOUGH I HATE TO SEE SUCH A YEAR COME TO AN END I LOOK FORWARD TO WHAT’S AHEAD IN THE YEAR AND YEARS TO COME. THIS YEAR I WILL MAKE NO RESOLUTIONS, ONLY PERSONAL GOALS WHICH I’LL KEEP TO MYSELF AND WORK ON PRIVATELY…BECAUSE…WELL, JUST BECAUSE.